It's a Friday. Well laid plans got botched up when we arrived at Kevin's only to find they had gone out. A call at 20 past 8, found me too tired to go out again. This Christmastime so far has been spent in a maze, obstacles and upsets every step a long the way has prevented any progress for me. I had children to care for up until the yesterday. No time to shop and no desire to do much. Tomorrow may be peaceful and fun with a visit over to K & T's for dinner. Money is so tight and health so fragile, this year Christmas finds me too tired and poor to really enjoy it.
But I also have good things in my life and I need to be grateful and look on the bright side. America hasn't collapsed - at least not yet - we still have freedom. And I have learned the thing that most stresses me (caring for children) is certainly the thing that most blesses me (being with the children). So while I am short on time and money and big on stress, I am over showered with the blessings of watching children grow and spend time with them. A glimpse every now and then into the mind and heart of a child is like passing under the light of heaven and feeling the glow pass through your soul.
One precious moment from this week was listening to 5 year old Benjamin say while attempting to build things with the magnetic set: "I'm trying so hard not to be a baby. I really want to make something that will be like I'm a big boy". His sincerity showing on his face and the look of honesty in his eyes gave me a startle and touch a cord on my heart strings. Oh, my, the precious pure expression of honest thoughts so overflowing from a child's lips that over time will be lost to cautiousness. If that were the only moment out of the week, the stress and difficulties are overshadowed by the brightness of the sun at noon day.
My facebook friends are all over the world now. Many of them live in countries that are facing wars and hardships that is beyond the scope of my experience and leave me with a sense of helplessness. Oh, how I wish the world would find peace, that the wars would end, that the greed and the pride of the Nations would be crushed and in it's place there would be compassion and love. I truly cannot bear the knowledge of so much suffering, it is a heavy burden on my heart. I pray to God for the Savior to come quickly and bring with Him the promised Peace and to bind Satan that he may not control the hearts of men any more.
My dogs sleep beside me on the couch. Their slow and even breathing are comforting to my melancholy heart. It is quiet and still. The only sound is the hum of the Refrigerator. I think of the child who lay in the manger and his lovely mother that cared for Him. There are no words to express my love for him. I am grateful for Christmas, for the message it brings. Nothing really matters in the end then, does it. Only the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the plan of salvation, the continuing of eternal family relationships. That's all there is.
