A trip to the temple with my grand daughter

It was a sunny day for December.  But even if the sun had been hiding there was a glow that day that shone about everyone.  White is the presence of all colors and describes the day.  Everything in white: the temple exterior, the temple interior, all dressed in white, and white lace over the alters.  Quite, peaceful, and calm is the feeling that enters throughout our whole beings upon entering this Holy place of the Lord.

As we greeted friends and family, the love and warmth was real and comforting. The feeling of peace within you was as strong as that which surrounded you.

It was not the first time for Richard and I to go through the temple. Interestingly, it had been close to 40 years since we ourselves, by ourselves, were married in the Los Angelos Temple.  Alone because there was no temple on the East Coast and no one on the West Coast in his family were temple goers.
So it was only us. The rooms were very very large and not very full.  But it was wonderful and a memory seared in both our minds.

Again we came back to that temple several years later with our little children, three were then sealed to us and I remember the little girls with white ribbons and the joy of having them with us in the Celestial room.

The next memorable event was at the DC temple when our son Kevin received his endowments, upon receiving his mission call.  It is still vivid in my mind all standing around together in the Celestial Room with him and the joy and happiness we felt.

It was not that long after that we attended another special session: Kevin and Traci's wedding in the Oakland Temple.  I remember most the tears in Traci's eyes as the session began and the officiator spoke to them about the importance of the commitment, he asked her to look around at her family that was there and that made here cry.  But it was a joyous occasion and they have been a joy in our family and a blessings to everyone.

And so now we have witnessed the circle of life, now Ashley at 19 received her temple endowments and will be leaving to serve as a full time missionary almost 40 years since my joining the church myself.  Her precious spirit is so sweet and pure and we all have confidence she will serve with honor and all will be blessed by her presence as we have been  blessed with her in our family.

May God go with her, keep her safe, and bring her home soon.  Keep the Angels surrounding her to guide and light her way.

When

When out walking yesterday, I notice the shadows cast by this bridge. It was early afternoon and sun was bright.  The shadows were very dark and sharp and quite beautiful.  But I thought to myslelf, what exactly are shadows? While Shadows appear to have shape and form they are however an illusion created when an object blocks light. They are not real and tangible but are negative images..  When light shines directly on something and not behind,  we see the true color, shape, and form of it. 

I began to realize how this concept applies to spiritual perception. When we see though the spirit of God, the light of Christ shows us things as they really are and not as they seem.  Without that light or when the light is blocked, then we see a shadow of what is really there. This idea made me want to embrace more of that light that I might see clearly the path I am following and not sumble on shadows of things that are not real. I just wanted to share this idea and hope it also makes sense to you. 

December 2014

Today I walked down the dirt trail by the lake surrounded by nature and enveloped in solitude. Along the winding path I pass dark shadows of silent trees and through their towering branches occasionally glimpse the silver waters of the lake.  I sense the love of Heavenly Father around me.  There is a peace in these woods, a sense of serenity and hope. It is as if all the raging oceans of my life empty into a quiet river with a soothing rhythm that brings me to a new place of security and rest. 

I'm awed by the magnificent handiwork of God. He whispers to me in feelings that magnify my testimony and faith in Him.  At this moment in time, on this day, in this place my soul soars a little bit higher increasing courage with a willingness to follow more closely the One who leads to Light.  Then seeing down the path a ways, my feet begin to move more swiftly toward the brighter light one determined step at a time.

Letting Go

Kristin posted this today about her work as a drug and alchohal counsellor.  I was so inspired by it and wanted to share :

Letting Go

I sit and listen to your woes
A life story you’ve never told
I can hear the anger and feel your pain
The anger in your heart  That holds you back

The door is now open  Just a crack
It’s ok to cry It’s ok to let it go
The words on your lips Just let them flow
I sit and watch as the tears stream down your cheeks
It takes all I have not to wipe away the streaks
It breaks my heart
To see the hurt and To feel your pain
But I hope someday You might be whole again
If I may If I might
Just help you darling With your fight
Your fight to live  and Your fight to try
Your fight to create a better life
I must admit to you now
As I am sure you already know
It won’t be easy its rather hard
But this my dear is quite a start
I must tell the truth and I must never lie
I must sit and listen and watch you cry
I am grateful for the trust You have placed in me
I am grateful to the scared little girl
You allow me to see
I sit and listen to your woes
A life story you’ve never told
I can hear the anger and feel your pain
The anger in your heart  That holds you back
The door is now open  Just a crack
It’s ok to cry It’s ok to let it go

December 8, 2014
First draft
Kristin McNulty

Inspired by the night I had at work yesterday. I have been at a loss for words really. I tried to put down in writing how I felt last night after a pretty intense session. This is a first really rough draft… I am grateful to my God for allowing me this opportunity to help attempt a miracle. I know that this is NOT me .. it is all GOD. I could not do this by myself without his help. I pray for the courage, strength and wisdom EVERY day to make better choices in the hopes that I just might be able to help another as they struggle to change their life. Life is sooooooooo difficult sometimes and sometimes people just need an ear and a hand and for someone to say you are not alone…… I am truly truly  grateful…. That’s all.

December 3, 2014

This week Richard and I attended a session at the Temple.  I was able to perform work for Karin Arvidsson, an ancester who lived in Sweden in the 1600's.  Such joy to be able to do this work for others and we are working hard to track our family lines so we may continue to seal our family together.  This is the work of Eternity that really matters not the everyday stuff that drags us down. 

My records are in such disarray, I hope to find a way to organize them.  Recently I've discovered several sites that have tons of information for keeping genealogical records.  I've pinned them to pinterest and will add a few here as a reference.

Christmas is in a few weeks.  The tree is up and lot's of decorations but there is so much to do to bring the holiday atmosphere into our home.  My regret is that our family is so spread out and that even those that live close to us we do not see often enough.

Ashley left to return to college.  Zac had a mental breakdown and is in a hospital in Tenn. after travelling across country and 1/2 way back only to be stranded in Ohio after trying to take his own life.  My heart has been broken once again because of the suffering of someone I love so much.  I pray he will heal and that he will survive with the Lord's help.  

Wow, it's been a year since I have written in this journal!! I wonder why.  Where have I been and what have I been doing.

Life is a tangible, living entity that evolves through time creating itself into a creature we hardly know :) and like a runaway train it speeds like lightening into the future while you stand amid the dust trying to see where it went.

Well, today I decided to begin again and get on the next train.  As I travel forward, my reflections will also be glancing to the recent past before the memories are completely faded from view.

Today I was thinking about people, realizing there are so many good people in my life whose relationships I treasure.  Feeling blessed though we are so desperately broke all the time, what I have in my life are people and that is of greater worth.

As I pondered the good and the evil in our world of 2014, I realized what is published and talked about most are the evil deeds and negative events in society.  Yet, I have come to know the other side of life as a Mormon.

"I have always loved being a member of my church.  I am a Mormon.  The people I have met through church have been some of the dearest sweetest people I've known in my life.  What impresses me the most is their desire to serve each other and their love and devotion to Jesus Christ.  There are many who strive everyday to follow the commandments of God, to give of themselves, to bear one another's burdens, to uplift and love those in need.  I know this is true of other church communities besides my own and am grateful to live in country where the followers of Jesus Christ are re-markedly following Him.  In the end what will matter the most is not what riches we have obtained for ourselves in this life, but what we have given of ourselves to the other people in it.  That is "The Road Less Traveled" that will make all the difference!!"

jeri

this is a favorite of mine and I wanted to post it today because I was thinking about how important it is to be true to oneself :)\\
                                                 "Myself"

by Edgar A. Guest

I have to live with myself and so
I want to be fit for myself to know,
I want to be able as days go by,
To look at myself straight in the eye.
I don't want to stand with the setting sun
And hate myself for the things I've done.

I don't want to hide on a closet shelf
A lot of secrets about myself,
And fool myself as I come and go
Into thinking that nobody else will know
What kind of man I really am;
I don't want to dress myself in sham.

I want to go with my head erect,
I want to deserve all men's respect
And in this struggle for fame and pelf
I want to be able to like myself.
I don't want to look at myself and know
That I am a bluster and empty show.

I cannot hide myself from me;
I can see what others can never see;
I know what others can never know,
I cannot fool myself, and so

Whatever happens, I want to be
Self-respecting and conscience free.